This is a BIG email. It has a lot of theory that you need to grasp before you’ll understand how our welcome swipes work, so I’ll give as many examples as I can.

Take your time. Maybe print this out, it’s definitely the most important part of this series of emails.

Before I go through the emails, let me explain the persuasion wizardry at play here.

There is a masterful book on persuasion by Blair Warren called “The Once Sentence Persuasion Course”

You can Google the book itself, but I’ll spare you the effort of finding the sentence itself:

“People will do anything for those who encourage their dreams, justify their failures, allay their fears, confirm their suspicions, and help them throw rocks at their enemies.”

Put in layman’s terms it sounds like this:

It’s ok, it’s not your fault you’re failing. It’s the bad guys over there. Let me show you how this really works.”

Have you ever felt like there’s something missing from the recipe of successful business? Something the “gurus” aren’t telling you?

This is what people feel like all the time, and justifiably so.

I honestly can’t give you everything you need for a successful business in the space of a few emails, but I can give you a piece of the jigsaw that you’ve probably not seen before.

I’m not selling you any tools so I can come at it from a different angle. I can talk about the content of your emails, not just how pretty your templates should be or what features your email tool should have.

I add to your understanding, with a new ingredient.

First I have to tell you why it’s missing from the recipe you were already given.

Logically there are 4 part to how we help our customer make this shift:

  1. The way they think it works
  2. How it actually works (according to your model)
  3. How you discovered this
  4. Why the myth persists

Let’s take a weight loss example.

The way you probable think it works is “diet plus excercise”.

Calories in minus calories out is how most people think about weight loss, and to an extent that’s right.

But we can still add to that equation.

One factor in weight loss that a huge number of people miss is stress, and specifically lack of sleep.

It raises cortisol – the stress hormone – and makes your body act like it does in times of famine, storing energy as fats.

So, if we can help you sleep better, we can help you shed fat with less effort, or shed more fat with the same effort.

Now, I know this to be true, because I bought a FitBit to see how much actual exercise I was doing, and when I looked at my data, the weeks with the best results were also the ones where I got most sleep.

I checked out the science and it turns out that yes, sleep does make a big difference to your ability to lose weight.

Why does nobody talk about this?

Because, until we invented FitBits and Oura rings, nobody could make money off you sleeping better.

Quite the opposite. Netflix has said that their biggest competitor is sleep!

OK, let’s match this to our 4 steps:

  1. The way they think it works:  Calories out vs calories in
  2. How it actually works: Calories out vs calories in times a “sleep factor”
  3. How you discovered this: Noticed it in my FitBit data
  4. Why the myth persists: There’s no way for anyone to sell you sleep

So, first you need to fill in these steps for your market, but don’t write your copy yet.

The order you present these in is critical.

If you start off with the “status quo” – what people already know, they’ll tune out and you’ll never get to the point.

You need to start with some DRAMA!!!

Drama wakes people up, engages their brain at the sight of something new, and makes them live your story along with you.

If in doubt, we start with a story.

That throws our sequence about a bit, and we need to move things along in an email. We have 2 of the 4 steps in our email, then the others,

  • Origin story – How you failed with the old way and discovered the new way (1+3)
  • How the myth has persisted (4)
  • How it actually works (2)

Here is an outline of how I’d write these if I was selling FitBit as a sleep-based weight loss tool.

Origin story – How I failed with the old way and discovered the new way (1+3)

  • Start with drama – feeling like I was having a heart attack.
  • Failed with the old way, tried everything, training for hours and unable to keep the energy for my day job.
  • Constantly tired so I bought a  FitBit to check if I was recovered enough for each training session
  • Noticed the sleep tracker went in line with my weight loss.
  • Tried cutting back on the gym a bit in favour of better sleep, got better results AND my work improved.

How the myth has persisted (4)

Until the advent of sleep trackers, nobody could “sell” you sleep.

Huge vested interests in the fitness and food industry keep you on yoyo diets.

Add to that the 24/7 hustle mantra of certain entrepreneur influencers and you have a recipe to do all the wrong things.

How it actually works (2)

Track your sleep using our FitBit & app and follow our training plan to match your intense exercise to your best rested days.

From here we expand on our offer with the usual ingredients (I wrote a guide a guide on creating offers here).

And we’re done!

Hopefully you’re still reading and not off to Amazon to find a sleep tracker just yet.

Let’s see it in full in one of my emails.

Click to get the first of the 3 welcome emails.


Stephen Pratley
Copy & Conversion Consultant
The Conversion Co.

c/o The Conversion Co., 2a The High Street, Thames Ditton, KT7 0RY, United Kingdom
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